Urge to Purge

For me, 2015 has proven itself to be a year of new beginnings.  In addition to all of these changes has come the strong urge to rid myself of the things that I no longer need in all areas of my life.  One of the ways that I have elected to accomplish this is to purge my closet of anything that is no longer needed.  Even though it seems like I do this every couple of years, this time is especially daunting because I have personally challenged myself to make sure there is a place for everything—no excuses.  This challenge has only highlighted the fact that I tend to hold onto to things for much longer than I should.

Pause.

Change is good, but it can hard.  I have found that quietly observing life around me has been the best way for me to navigate through this season in my life.  I have given up holding on to old ways of life and have simply let them fall away without missing a beat.  I try not to overthink anything as I realize that good things take time and I should remain patient. 

I have always been someone who cares deeply for others, but I taken this time to be attentive to my needs and to take care of myself first.  So for me, this has been a season of pause.  Pause to think about and identify what my needs are and what my next moves are going to be.  Pause to plan out how I want my life to be and to be strong enough to be able to execute that plan.

Many of my heart's desires are coming true, and I have to prepare myself in order to be ready to receive that.


So today I encourage you to Pause.  It can make all the difference in the world.

Patience is a Virtue

“Patience is the calm acceptance that things can happen in a different order than the one you have in mind.”
― David G. Allen

“Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.”
― Aristotle

“Why is patience so important?"
"Because it makes us pay attention.”
― Paulo Coelho

Patience.  It’s the thing that I seem not to have enough of, despite most people describing me as a “patient person.”  I think my (usually) soft-spoken demeanor and quiet strength steers people to believe that I have loads of patience.  Sometimes this is true.  But if you’ve spent enough time around me, you have soon learned that I have had moments where my penchant for patience was severely lacking.  Just like gratitude, patience is something that we have to sometimes practice at.  Here are some scenarios in which we can exercise our patient practices:

Be a Goal Digger

Goal digger.  Driven. Ambitious.  Those are some of the words that come to mind when I think of someone who has had success in accomplishing their goals.  But what if you’re someone who can’t seem to finish what you've started?  A procrastinator even? Here are some strategies that I have used to help me get closer to reaching my goals, no matter what they are.

An Attitude of Gratitude

It is always so easy to get caught up in what you don’t have; but have you ever taken the opportunity to reflect on what you do have and how blessed you are?  In my experience, gratitude always attracts more things to your life to be grateful for.  Sometimes you have to take a moment to put things into perspective...

Artist Spotlight

Safari Ride



Today's post is featuring Nottingham UK artist Laura E. Hutton.  If you are a fan of ethnic art, chances are you have come across one of  her many pieces via social media.  The first time I stumbled upon her work, my eyes were immediately tantalized by images that were bursting with vibrant hues that showcased beautiful women of all shades of color.  Recurring themes in Hutton's art are love, family, female empowerment, sensuality, sisterhood and body positivity.  In addition to the doe eyes and cupid's bow lips the women in Hutton's drawings possessed, I could not help but notice that these women were also very curvaceous!  I immediately became a fan of her work.

Black Diamond

I recently had the opportunity to interview Laura E. Hutton about her journey on becoming an artist:

Purple Kisses

From left: Violet Volt (Milani), Blue Rose (NYC), Heroine (MAC), Lullabye (Kat Von D), Loud & Clear Lilac (Cover Girl)

In honor of National Lipstick Day, I decided  to do my first beauty post!  Lately I have been finding myself attracted to lip colors that contain purple hues.  Here are some of the lip colors that I found in my makeup bag, I took a photo showcasing each  color:

The Friend Zone

The dreaded “Friend Zone” … the place where romantic aspirations go to die, or do they?  Over the years, I have heard men and women alike complaining about being delegated to the Friend Zone.  Let me share a story:

I had met a young man who was interested in me and had asked for my number.  Because I was also interested, I obliged.  During the first week of getting to know this guy, it was evident that he was in a hurry to be in a relationship.  While I liked this guy, entering a relationship so quickly didn’t seem like such a good idea.  But because I was interested, I used our time to learn as much about him as I could.  When he realized that I wasn’t ready to be in a relationship with him (we had only been talking for less than 2 weeks), he became upset and declared that I was putting him in the “Friend Zone”.  I told him that if he ever planned on entering into a relationship with me that I prefer that we get to know each other and become friends first.  Almost immediately, his attitude toward me changed and he was no longer interested in pursuing a relationship with me.  His actions told me that he was more interested in being in a relationship than actually getting to know me as a person.  Honestly, if he was willing to give our friendship a chance to flourish, I’m pretty sure that I would have become ready to be in a relationship with him.  But, we never got that chance.

 

So is being in the friend zone such a terrible thing? I think it’s quite the opposite.

Father’s Day: A Different Perspective on Fatherhood

I am a single mother.  My son knows his father, but his father and I have never really raised our son as a unit.  I remember one Father’s Day about ten years ago when someone I knew greeted me with “Happy Father’s Day!”  At first I was puzzled, but then I quickly realized that she was referring to me as my son’s father because single parents are often said to have to be “both mom and dad”. 

Personality Test

Recently, someone suggested to me that I take a personality test in order to gain some insight on why I am the way that I am.  So I headed over to http://www.16personalities.com/ and answered the questionnaire.  The analysis that this website provided me was so telling that it was scary.

Why I Left Facebook

I recently took about a 6 week hiatus from Facebook.  Like most of you, I had deactivated my account before but this time was different.  I possessed a very strong urge to pursue my solitude, and Facebook just didn’t fit into the equation.  The months leading up to my break, Facebook started to feel more like more a chore and less like a source of entertainment.  The social media app that was designed to bring people closer together started to make me feel strangely alienated from everyone, including my “real life friends”.  I noticed that spending time on Facebook started to drain my energy and shift my focus onto things that were not important.  I started to be left with a very dissatisfied taste in my mouth and it shouldn’t have been that way.  Here are some of the reasons that I was able to pinpoint that led to my Facebook “detox”:

Know Your Worth

Oftentimes when people don’t choose you, it has nothing to do with you.  The truth is, some people don’t even love themselves enough in order to have the ability to choose themselves.  They’ll tell you that you have too many requirements, that your standards are too high and that you don’t make it easy for them.  Re-read the last part of that last sentence:  You don’t make it easy for them. 

Looking Back

Note: I wrote the following approximately 3 months ago, when I was just beginning a new temporary working assignment.  It was my first time in a full time job since before I'd gone back to school, and I had a lot of doubts about my abilities and effectiveness.  The job opportunity turned out to be a really awesome experience, and I am excited at how far I have come in such a short period of time.

Allow Me to Reintroduce Myself

It’s been awhile, but I’m back, and happy to be here I might add.  I may know some of you from the world of blogging, some of you from social media (as far back as MySpace lol), some of you I may actually know in real life and some of you I may not know at all.  Whatever the case, I’m happy that you’ve made your way here to visit my blog. 

Coming Soon

With lots of excitement, I'm happy to announce that great things are coming soon!  Please check back.